tuck in yuh belly

before i get into my weekend... what is up with that grown ass woman stealing that young girls baby, then killing the girl? i just cant believe that stuff like that happens. it is soo soo soooo sooo sad. i see movies like that on lifetime but i never heard an actual real story on the news. that is such a terrible crime & i truly believe any woman who has the balls to cut out a pregnant womans baby & steal it, needs to rott n hell because you have serious sick issues.

anyways, the dark knight was so on point, definitely go see that. its pretty long so make sure you take a nap before. lol. the joker played by heath ledger (RIP) kept me at the edge of my seat the entire time. i mean no one else could have played that role any better & i truly mean that.

i got a headache & im tired. bf came to visit this week & it was cool, we had fun. still trying to figure out though if we were 'supposed' to get back together though. sometimes it is very difficult to fix things that cant be fixed. a relationship is hardwork; it is like a full time job. & sometimes i dont feel like the salary is high enough. but at the end of the day, i love him & i cant see myself with anyone else. so i will continue to play this by ear.

ive finally mastered the whole diet (exercising & healthy food) situation. that shit is a full time job as well. trying to stay on top of going to the gym & eating the right foods can sometimes make u frustrated because it all boils down to consistency. & at this point in my life, i do too much to be consistent. discipline i guess is something i have mastered recently. anyways i am working my way towards a slimmer body which has been my main goal in life for the past 6 months. i let go of myself a lil and i must say i was pissed the fuk off cuz my clothes stop fitting, & people kept makin comments. naturally i dont care what people say, but it can get annoying when certain people who's opinion does matter to you, keep constantly reminding you. not to mention ive been entirely too broke to afford a whole new wardrobe. okay a shirt here or there, or maybe a pair of jeans every month, but ALL of my clothes were getting tight and i needed to do something quick. so i joined LA fitness back in december when i was talkng to this guy who was all about health & wat not..& i tried the whole salad bullshit and eating pretty much birdseeds, lol not literally but just eating shit that i didnt like, was tasteless, and at the end of the day i was starving. so in the past month i took another approach. many small meals. ive heard people talk about this all the time, "eat small portions, eat 5-6 meals per day, it speeds up ur metabolism and youre never hungry." well who the fuk has time to make 5 to 6 meals a day. then it clicked to me: a meal can simply be a snack. AH HA!

so now i can say i have 3 full time jobs. PHA, boyfriend, and diet. I seriously deserve 6 figures for all the bullshit, true story.